my girlfriend is always late reddit

New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the relationships community. Then again, she could just be texting her best girlfriend. all the rest sound like a waste of time and itd be better to get a girlfriend that i wont have to sit down with and write a plan for her happynes..i can think of lots of things id rather do, like, being single. I'm talking about the friend who is always three hours late without texting or offering an apology, or the friend who constantly leaves you hanging without confirming or … I came to the point in my relationship in which I really dont know what to think, and I feel like listening to some opinions of anonymous strangers. I can't just "not worry" but I can subside the feelings till something happens otherwise there's no point in relationships if you're always worried. I like this comment and support it. Explain to her that she brings you down and it bothers you and you need to move on. I eventually came to my senses on how unhappy I was and ended things. There was my daughter, ready to play and looking around for my friend," the woman remarked. My gf is Albanian and I swear Albanians hold the torch for being late. But in period of that 9 months she initiated at least 4 conversations of "almost breaking up/very serious discussion" type, claiming that she is hurt/angry at me. My girlfriend had a problem with me being friends with a girl. TL;DR My GF is always angry at me, very often without good aparent reason. It's so similar. To get a clue, examine her body language when that next text pings at 1:11 AM. WRONG. Dump her. Only then are you able to respond. Then I discovered that my gf gets upset very easy over matters which seem minor/not worth getting nervous about to me. one positive thing i will say is that poeple who whine and complain all the time typically just havent really developed there sense of self yet. I changed that, because my friends are awesome enough to be honest with me, and now I'm one of the more positive and upbeat of my friends. Maybe you can influence change in her by being that good positive example, but expect nothing in your efforts. Does she want to break up with me? It would take a particularly brazen cheater to regularly text the other person right in front of you. Let's see if her behavior changes at all after you following these three steps for 2 months. I saw a study once that said that cynics are generally happier in life. It could be as simple as hiking, taking a walk around a place you haven't walked, or kayaking, ziplining, rock-climbing or whatever. All right here is the deal. 3. I apologised 100 times, she did maybe twice. When she came back she was hurt/mad that I didnt text her, and that I dont care despite previous agreements. Press J to jump to the feed. I think she is a good and valuable person. Do you think it is possible for you to do that? 2. I worry about everything, stress out, and yeah, can be pretty negative. It’s all my fault… just tell me what you want me to do to make things right and I will do it. Of course I had my doubts, whether she is the one, but I never voiced them, and again, I try to cultivate our relationship (but I need personal space too). My mother had me at 14 and guess what she's only ever had intercourse with one bloke and surprisingly that's my … r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. This is much too logical for the average female to comprehend. if your girlfriend is edging up on 30. I love her lots, but this little thing is starting to get under my skin. It is always my fault. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Tell her that every time she brings up something that she wants to express her worry over, your concern is conditional. You can help her, but you can't be responsible for her happiness, just your actions and reactions. I can't say that I'm Miss Smiles or Miss Happy-Go-Lucky or anything like that, but I will always be grateful to her for teaching me how to be more positive. Correct? If you think it's not an outrageous request, then maybe you can Google for some ideas, or go on LivingSocial for such coupons. It is her hobby to sail, and I was really happy for her, but simultaneously a little sad that she just decided without consulting me. My girlfriend always pretends she is dead Hey Reddit, I was hoping to get some advice about a problem I've been having with my SO. As far as you're girlfriend, she'll never change. We see each other rarely so we had some alcohol and laughs. it sux, but you have to find someone new. I dont feel comfortable, nor secure. My girlfriend is late to everything. My previous relationship was nothing like this, and even if we split up with my exgf for some serious reason, we were almost never angry at each other. She ate crap, stayed up till wee hours studying, watched a … Not to be mean to her, but because you deserve to be with someone that is up to your standards. TEE HEE~!". Just because she was a girl. Then you will help her write down a plan on how to tackle the problem for 5 minutes. I will do anything!” When a guy is faced with an angry girlfriend that he truly loves, it’s only natural that he will want to apologize to her and make things right. LISTEN to what she is actually saying. She can change, but the difficult part is first getting her to realize that she is painfully cynical, and second is getting her to take the initiative. I didnt think of asking her to pass my birthday wishes to her mother, ok thats my fault. So hi there. Never mind that, really listen to her, and ask for clarifications if you are not clear, ask for specific examples if it's too general. This was too much, it was painful and I … and that meant making love on a regular basis. Wednesday an old flame hit her up and they ended up sleeping together on saturday. But if I make one mistake, one slip, she is instantly mad/hurt. Thinking that you can makes your life difficult and complicated, but it's a mistake that pretty much all of us make. I also concur; it's all about expectations. Long story short (too late, but meh, whatever), whenever I start to get negative now, I think about positive things to balance it out. When I invited her to the party it was ok at the start but, quickly she got nervous, and finally got mad at me when we were going home I walked on the red light through the street (she stayed on the other side of the road and I waited). Slowly, compared to what? My gf is always 2 hours + late. You will listen to her feelings of worry for 5 minutes. If she doesn't change at all, then maybe it's time for you to break up. well, the damseling part. First off, we are both 22 (M & F), finishing our last year of college. Honestly, you can't. After you assessed what she wants, and determined whether or not it's possible for you to do that. Or maybe Im just a bad guy, and hurt her by my style of being. She talks about how bad her work is, how sad her life is, and how depressed she always is. she just told me about it monday. The "loss of spark" that you're feeling is your subconscious picking up on her body language becoming more and more closed off. I dated a girl like this. The likely thing is that she's becoming less attracted to you. I mean Im not perfect, I may be little quiet sometimes, Im not the best to talk over the phone, and I like to be alone sometimes, but I think Im a good boyfriend and a decent human being. And most recently: my friends from other city visited me. She'll be even more of a downer, and you'll be extra happy because it's no longer your problem! Hers is even worse than my girlfriend's, but I'm confident that they share a common or at least similar cause. As the relationship progressed there was a lot of great things, and obviously some problems emerged as well. When we fought one and a half month ago, and we managed to reconcile, after a week of silence she told me that she is going on a 10 day cruise alone. Slowly as opposed to replying to you immediately - right on the spot? The hardest part is seeing the re-conditioning through. The next day she had her mother's birthday, so I sent some texts, to which she didnt reply. I dont lie to her, dont cheat, I want her to participate in my life. #6 The confused girlfriend. initially we she used to visit me a lot when she did her 2nd year, so we would always be together. We’re now living in an age of Instant Gratification. Hi dan,my girlfriend and I are together for 2 years now,and its the 3rd time that she has been to the club without me,she even says that she doesn’t want any commitments now,where as I do,During these 2 years we haven’t been to a club together,and I don’t know what’s going on behind my back,but she goes with her elder girl cousins to the club.please help me,I need some advice. SUNSHINE AND RAINBOWS! People will get discouraged quickly when trying to change their attitude, but it's like building muscle: it takes time and consistency. People are saying she can't/won't change, but I don't necessarily agree, and the reason is because I used to be far more cynical than I am now and generally just an undesirable person to those who weren't my best friends. Where did you take that from? Ladies, your boyfriend is so lucky to have found you right? However, other factors may be … It will probably just piss her off and make matters worse. You just need to go ahead and do it! My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 5 months and everything has been absolutely great. We agreed that she will send me postcard, and will write me emails from the boat to which I will respond beacause telephone communication could be limited. Correct? My girlfriend has changed like 110%. Then, she told me she is going to another crusie/sail in one month from now. My girlfriend is 21, but my coworker is in her late fourties. If your mate is always late and/or also causing you to be late with them, it’s important for you to demonstrate the alternative behavior that you’d like to see. That means employing your own time management strategies. We've been dating 3 years. However, one thing that has become a SLIGHT issue is the consistent changing of plans on her part. i just went through abot 10 months of the same thing. Nothing shady, no history diving or anything. In the beginning everything was really swell, although she had little time for me and we met only like 1-2 times a week. It's hard. I started dating my girlfriend at the start of this year. If thats the case, I probably should end this? Late-night texting could be a sign that she’s trying to conceal her communications with someone from you. Please forgive me. It's powerful. It's really beginning to bother me. I say sorry so we can sustain our relationship. It really has given me a new perspective. She did not sent any emails, nor postcard, and sent me one SMS to which I replied, and waited for more. “I’m so sorry! Annoyance offers opportunities for growth. Now she is angry at me, and tells me that I dont care like I used to do. Clearly you love her and want this relationship to work. If your girlfriend can’t ever just see the bright or happy side of anything, she’s probably too negative. However, keep in mind, it may not be all that easy to know if she’s talking to someone.. Get another girlfriend. "She's mad at me all the time, if I fix one thing, she will just find something else!" This is perhaps the most obvious sign your girlfriend is cheating of them all.. Is she always chatting or texting with some new guy?Then, she’s probably cheating. Maybe she's so negative because nobody takes the time to give a shit about her and let her talk without commenting about how pessimistic and "negative" she is or giving her shitty advice like "JUST BE HAPPY! The only question is how to put it on the right track. It was a pretty good little tactic. It is always … But before you have done your part, you can't just complain about her attitude and not take action to amend the relationship yourself. And she seems like a nit picky asshole. Your second step is to ASSESS. dont feel bad, lots of people are like this. It's really beginning to bother me. I notice the same characteristics: no matter what time of day, no matter what she's eaten, if you get close, you can smell her breath. Do you think you can manage to arrange one of these things to do with her? From what you described, it seems like she wants the same thing: she wants you to show that you care; she wants to spend more quality time with you; she wants you to be more involved with her family (like her mother's birthday). In the beginning everything was really swell, although she had little time for me and we met only like 1-2 times a week. My girlfriend is always giving out about something or someone, stressing or worrying over something stupid, or just being moody. My recommendation is to always withdraw from the relationship for a set period of time, for example “1 week” and increase the punishment from there.) Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. But she started these "its going wrong" conversations 3-4 times so far, there were times when we almost broke up, and she is always mad at me. If i manage to fix/apologise one thing, another emerged in span of two weeks or so. You can't change people. Before, my girlfriend used to be an average college student. If you’re saying, “My girlfriend nags me all the time but I don’t know why” let me tell you why: It’s because she’s feeling more masculine than you. Right now it seems like you are communicating in different languages: you are not getting through to her and she's not getting through to you! From my experiences dealing with people, I have arrived at the firm belief that the only person you can directly change and control is yourself. She can be very loving, and understanding, we have fun together, plus she is really smart. I started dating my girlfriend at the start of this year. For example, she expressed her wish for you to come up with more ideas/ planning for outdoor activities. This is a relationship were talking about here. But you gotta take an action. But in your case, your relationship is very much alive! I need some help with my girlfriend please. I love her, but god, sometimes I just want to shake her and tell her be happy! OP you really want someone who respects you. You … Bottom line is you need to communicate your feelings and thoughts to her and also "draw a line in the sand" as it were. Just break up with her, you'll feel better. It's not like she's cheating or you are cheating, right? In the age of instant everything, waiting for a response from someone you're dating can feel like it takes ages. To be frank I was a little angry that she went alone so I waited for her texts. You can't change her, she has to want to change in the first place, and then she needs to figure out the root cause. I read a study once that said sperm ejeculated into/onto mucous membrane can make women happier. I explained that I do. Feel free to express your thoughts and ask questions. And her negativity will rub off on you and you’d feel drained and tired each time you meet her. If she doesn't leave you, you need to be willing to leave her based off of how the serious conversation with her goes. you cant change a person, see, your girlfriend, like mine, somehow learned along the way that the only way to communicate is through complaining. It's fucking unbelievable, but her friends make us wait 2 hours. Get More Dear Prudence. my girlfriend and I went on a break a week ago. Complaining is contagious and automatic. You shouldn't EVER feel like you have to tiptoe through the tulips for that person. I'm in the exact same boat. ACTION. Annoyance in a relationship is not always a bad thing because it can be a sign that there’s still life in the relationship. Ever try talking to her to see what's annoying/bothering her or making her worry? I'm a pretty realistic-bordering-on-negative person, and it's something that I've kind of struggled with throughout my life. look. “I was using my girlfriend’s laptop to research stuff, while she was out of the room. Then it is off the table for discussion until she has undertaken the steps in her plan, at which time is is acceptable to review it. It is likely something to do with your family of origin. If you need an urgent response to fix your situation, please don't hesitate to book an email or phone consultation with me and I'll get back to you ASAP. I am someone that finds this incredibly annoying and … RUN. And you need to let her if this is the case. "Let her be late for me, sure, I'm fine with it. A lot of good will come from listening. But these constant quarells left me exhausted. But its only few months and I dont know her mother that good. She may very well leave you then. One thing that one of my exes did, was ask me, every day, for one positive thing that happened that day. Rather than saying, “My girlfriend wants to go out alone with her friends,” and feeling like you’re losing her, work on deepening the attraction, love and respect that she feels for you. In last 4 months things are spinning slightly out of control. /r/Relationships is a community built around helping people and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors. Apparently optimists spend so much time looking at the bright side of things that everything is a huge let down, and pessimists spend so much time thinking about how terrible everything is, they never have time to enjoy anything. She is fed up with me? Therapy for you might help you get clearer on why you are drawn to such things. Every time its about different thing. As the relationship progressed there was a lot of great things, and obviously some problems emerged as well. Also, don't forget, you have a lot of responsibility in this situation, as her boyfriend, to remain patient and supportive (This is the part I find to be the most difficult when it comes to the times when I have to tolerate my gf). New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I think if she's willing to work on it then a few books and some patience can probably change things up for the better for both you. As a cynic I doubt your conclusion until you provide concrete proof. In which case, I would also say this relationship is over. I think you should break up with her, you two are on different levels. My girlfriend is always giving out about something or someone, stressing or worrying over something stupid, or just being moody. Help! Yay! I agree with CeilingWax: You cannot change her—only yourself. :). Is it something you could do within reasonable means? I think I still love her. When she was nervous/hurt, I was very apologetic and took the blame even I felt its unfair/didnt deserve it. I feel like its really not working, while I am afraid to lose her. This is my first post ever. We managed to meet more often and we spend together 4-6 days a week. She is almost ALWAYS mad at me. However, the cynic takes things at face value, and any improvement on their preconceived ideas is a bonus. Thank you for reply, but hey I was never drinking and driving! Like regularly, every 2 weeks or something. It could be a chemical imbalance, where the person produces far too much adrenalin, but this will also show as problems sleeping, and constant fear. Press J to jump to the feed. A late menstrual period can be worrisome, especially when periods are usually regular and unexpected pregnancy is a concern. With this headlight, maximum visibility is always present, whether at night, or at day with it's beautiful Always-On LEDs. Tweet; Share; View Transcript. She rebuffs my attempts to help and I think we're having a communication breakdown where I'm afraid to bring up certain topics in order to … She accuses me of being unsensitive, not planning to go out more/having exciting ideas for outdoor activity, drinking too much alcohol (I occasionally party, and my friends like to drink quite a much but I not alcoholic by any means), etc. Do what I do. We seek posts from users who have specific and personal relationship quandaries that other redditors can help them try to solve. With it's ability to sprint from 0-60 in under 2.9s and be virtually bulletproof, Cybertruck is the best platform for an advanced, beautiful, technological reliant future. We have been together for about 5 months and I love her much but she is constantly busy and can never make time for me. Because emotions will prevent you from truly listening, and you'll be eager to either defend yourself or explain yourself. When you do that, she will want to stay home with you because she’ll be afraid of losing you. It might be as easy as saying hi to her mom next time she's on the phone with her. I have been dating my girlfriend for almost 8 months and she just doesn’t seem to have emotions. As they say, change comes from within. It could just be age, I went through a time when I was pretty down on most things. I am almost sure she doesnt like 3/4 of my friends. i found a job in another town so in her 3rd year we were in a long distance r/ship i would see 1's or 2's a week and sumtyms not see her for a week or two. But my girlfriend believes soo. Stop her and say, “Honey, is there anything you are thankful for? Next time when you are communicating, make your top task - "understand her". You need to have a very serious conversation with her about this, and you need to realize that - based on the past - she will likely be pissed at you for this conversation. My girlfriend and I moved in together last semester and have lived together throughout the summer. It really depends on the causes of the negativity. I remember thinking the exact same thing. Me [22M] with my girlfriend [21F] of 7 months, found out she’s a “furry” and in the fandom, got angry when I found out. Once, after a bike trip and having some icecream, she started randomly crying when we were watching some tv series, when I asked she didnt want to tell me whats going on, then gave in, and asked me if I still care for her. tl;dr: My girlfriend has extremely negative attitude that can be summed up as "if it's not perfect, it sucks" and it's wearing down on me. You are forcing her to be somewhat of “the man” in the relationship and she’s feeling the burden of always having to … There is a reason that you are attracted to someone who is perpetually bummed. I've been in a similar situation but I was the one talking to a girl who is my best friend and I also talk to my ex who has always been a friend. I love her, but god, sometimes I just want to shake her and tell her be happy! Two people that are spending time with each other because they make each other happy. Or disappointed? It could previous encounters with people and is a defensive mechanism. I feel like she doesnt pay attention to little good things I do, and she doesnt appreciate my everyday, mundane efforts. Im exhausted by it, and idk what to do. “ This usually gets my own wife to realize that she's complaining.

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